In our day to day lives, it may not always be possible to interact with only positive people and even if we are a positive person ourselves, everyone has days where they feel under the weather. However, if we want to surround ourselves with positive friends, then we need to strive to be someone who is positive. Having good influences in one’s life will greatly improve our attitude and ways of thinking on many things and it will contribute to the peace and happiness in our lives. I really do believe that we attract what we project to various extents, in the sense that if we’re kind and caring to others, we’re far more likely to attract people who are also kind and caring towards us.
This may not be always the case, and sometimes in life there are those who need positive people to help them escape their negative feelings. However, in the end we are the ones who are in control of our own feelings, thoughts and actions. We should all strive to be the person we truly are. I say this, because I believe that everyone has a light within themselves, but it’s a matter of switching it on. Surrounding your life with positive people includes yourself, as what you feed your mind is so important and living in the present means you aren’t robbed of thoughts from the past and worries about the future.
Positive people are motivating, inspiring and have values of being kind, friendly, supportive and encouraging. It’s being confident in your skin and realising that life goes on. It means not allowing certain people to get the reaction they want out of you, knowing you’re in control of your actions and learning to be patient, caring, loving and understanding. I do find people who are unkind always teach us a lesson, because they teach us to not be like that and they remind us we should treat others how we would want to be treated. They also teach us to learn to forgive and let go, rather than hold on and feel bitter about small things.
I believe that the friends we surround ourselves with are so so important, because they also show a level of reflection of our identification of who we connect with and what characteristics we are attracted to. Some of the most positive people I know are selfless, non judgmental, truly caring, very honest, good listeners, willing to help and encouraging. We should manifest what we attract and project what we believe in. The moment I feel negative, upset or angry is very often when I think of thoughts from the past or worries about the future, and that’s why there are countless books advising us to stay in the present. Striving to stay in the present is the best gift of all.
Positivity ties in with gratitude because it tells us of all the things we have which are overflowing when we recognise it. I recently read an article here that says that 90% of the things we worry about don’t ever happen. That is to say, most of the things we tend to worry about don’t happen. There is a paragraph that reads “人們總是浪費太多時間在後悔過去和擔心未來，以至於無法好好感受當下的人生，不僅無法好好愛自己，同時也錯過許多美好的時刻。” which says: people tend to waste a lot of their time by regretting their past and worrying about the future. They are not able to live in the moment, they aren’t able to truly love themselves and they miss out on many beautiful moments.
Sometimes pain is mixed with pleasure and it becomes a habit, which makes it harder to stop. This means a negative person may complain a lot, feel a lot of anger inside, feel that their life is hard and blame other people. They project how they’re feeling onto other people, and often the things they say to others are simply a reflection of what they’re feeling inside. No one is perfect, but when we practice gratitude and letting go of parts ourselves that don’t help our self growth, we can feel true freedom. Being negative holds us in a cage and it grows bigger if we keep feeding it bad thoughts, but when we think positively it flourishes even quicker and it’s contagious and encourages other’s to do the same, because it feels good.
There are people who have a lot of money and are unhappy, have no money and are happy, have money and are happy and have no money and are not happy. Life is what we make of it in any given situation, and it’s the willingness to create the life that we want to live. That’s why our thoughts are so powerful, because they allow us to take the first step and create the path we want to walk on. When we become more positive, we attract beautiful things into our lives and we feel good about ourselves. It’s all energy that is projected into the world. Happiness is not relied on others, and can only depend on yourself. This means that you have the ability to make your own choices.
Long-term happiness is from the relationships we have with people. Truly positive people make you feel beautiful, because they see the beautiful qualities you have inside and bring the best out of you. Positivity makes us complain less, want to be a better person, feel motivated, become more resilient, judge less and be kinder. This is why people often say comparison is the thief of joy, because it is one aspect that grows and feeds negativity if we don’t use it as motivation. It eats us alive and tells us that we aren’t good enough, but you absolutely are. Every person is good at many things, but the most important step to being positive is to love yourself and believe in yourself.
Art by Lieke van der Vorst